“Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.''

'Daddy, how many whoppers are there in those tall trees?' After waking up in the car while driving through Calaveras Big Trees and hearing daddy say, 'Wow, that's a whopper of a tree.'

Nobody has ever before asked the nuclear family to live all by itself in a box the way we do. With no relatives, no support, we've put us in an impossible situation.

“I wasn't yawning, I was just letting some fresh air into my mouth.” (After being accused of being tired.)

“This is our house. And this is America Online.” (While pointing at a map of the North American continent.)