The roaring of the wind is my wife and the stars through the window pane are my children. The mighty abstract idea I have of beauty in all things stifles the more divided and minute domestic happiness.

“If all the people in the world were nice could we just get rid of the word mean?”

I hope they get here soon. The kids are biting at the chomp.

“This is our house. And this is America Online.” (While pointing at a map of the North American continent.)

'There is no such thing as 'fun for the whole family.''